They say people can't love you until you figure out how to love yourself.
It's time to stop fighting the obvious, that nothing will ever go back to how it was and what you so desperately want back. You made the decisions you did, because you fell out of it. There's a reason for everything, but in denial, you're blind to it. it's time to move on.
So stop thinking about the past and how you want that kind of love back.
Because you're never going to be able to have someone love you, if you don't even love yourself.