sometimes, life doesn't make sense to me at all. i don't understand why bad things happen over and over again. my life took a complete whirlwind in the past 48 hours. 48 hours ago, i was sitting in my room and now i'm sitting in my best friend alex's house, 1570 miles away from my room.
when i was here visiting michigan, i had decided i was going to go to GRCC in the fall. I had my mind set on going, and i was determined. when i got home, i started to have second thoughts, and didn't know if it was for me, or necessarily the right decision. i told my family i was having second thoughts, and that i needed to think it over. the next morning i decided i was just gonna go for it, and see what happens. i called my family and they said they wanted me to wait a year to decide what i wanted. that night, a series of unfortunate events occurred, causing that my little sister would have to move to michigan. we packed up 5 suitcases, 3 trash bags, a backpack, and a laundry basket- then shoved it all in my car and headed for a hotel for the night. i said my goodbyes to my most loved ones, and bawled my eyes out the entire day. this morning i jumped on a plane, and now i'm here.
when i was little i always would ask "why me?". i would pray to God over and over again, asking him that question. when i was a teenager, i would always ask God to take it all away, i always just wanted all the problems to go away. now that i'm coming into adulthood, i lost the prayer in my life. last night, after i said my final goodbye, i was laying in our bed in the hotel room, with my little sister, all alone and i prayed to God to not let my little innocent sister go through what i did. i thanked him for making me as strong as he did when i was so young, because i know i wouldn't of survived these past events if it weren't for him doing that.
i'm grateful for good friends, strength, and my family. i know this is going to be extremely hard at first, but i know in the long run, it is going to make me stronger- and that alone, helps me keep going.