Sunday, June 24, 2012

Tiffanie

And it takes one person to give you hope, the one person that knows what to say in any situation. That's my Tiffanie.

"I'm sitting in my car with the little lights on above me reading this and bawling. I'm so lucky to have you. I'm so sorry i'm gone here- away from you when you need me- i have a tendency of doing that.. I'm sorry. For heavens sakes, without you i'd be so lost. I wouldn't even be able to text you from my phone right now if you hadn't taught me. There comes a point in a friendship where you stop being friends and you become sisters. That happened to us a long time ago cass. A long time ago. I want you to remember something for me ok? When everyone else is lost and confused, you've always been the one to bring them back. You always know exactly what they need to hear and what you need to do. Like when your mom gets sad and locks herself away how she's done all your life, or when brooke was goin through such a dark phase. Or now with elly. I know you feel lost and worthless right now and it feels like your compass is broken and you don't know where you're going. But just remember how many people you've been the lighthouse for. You've been mine, all my Life. And i need you forever. You have such a huge purpose. You have touched so many people's lives. Just think of all the random girls in highschool who would randomly leave you fb messages confessing how much they look up to you and adore you. You're not alone- there's an entire cassie fan club just around the corner. You're so loved. Think of your baby twin girls back at home- if anything, you're here for them. They need you. Someones gotta teach them to live love and hold their own. Think of Lu. No matter how much you guys fight, i know you miss her so bad. And i know she misses you. She looks up to you and wants to be just like you. Think of your uncle: how proud he is of you. He got to see you work your tail off and see you graduate: so grown up, so strong and beautiful. Cass of all the things he could have said to you, he didn't say 'figure out what you wanna do with your life, you need to become something and make someone me yourself' .. He's not even worried about that. He knows you will. He knows your heart cass. And he knows how damn Determined and strong you are. I don't even worry about you. You.ll figure it out. You always do. You help us all figure it out and no wonder you feel like the last one standing around trying to decide- because you're always busy helping everyone else figure out who they wanna be and live their dreams. I'm so lucky to have you cass. You got this.. I'm here every step of the way, two seconds away for you always, i promise. I'm here for you anytime. And obvi i wish i was there to come crawl into bed with you and hold your hand til we fell asleep. I would if i could. I'm there in spirit- and you're here, always with me. I'm glad to have you back. I've needed you so bad. It's going to be okay. You're cassidy vansolkema. You got this. I have all the faith in the world in you. Don't let anyone rush you. This is only the beginning. The world is an empty canvas and its time for you to paint what you feel. Whatever you decide to paint, i will love your art. You're amazing- don't let a bad night or few get to your head. You're my angel and i need you forever"

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