Wednesday, January 26, 2011

beyond going back.

i really don't share this things with a lot of people, but i feel like if i'm going to completely going to get over something.. i need to share everything. so here is something i wrote about the unmentionable boy, about... 3 months ago? i know, it's kind of cheesy, and i don't really feel this way anymore, well not completely, but it's called...

return to me

the time had came, 

and i knew nothing would be the same.
shivering, you, sitting at 7/11
seeing you was like looking straight into heaven.
saying goodbye to you, i knew, would be the hardest thing
not knowing what our future would bring.
but i kissed you one last time, 
and we said our goodbyes.

with you, i knew it was something special and rare
and we never had enough time together to spare.
living 1588 miles away brought pain and grief, 
and sometimes our phone calls felt so brief.
times with you were so bliss, 
i felt so glad to have someone so great to miss.

i miss the way we held hands, and you’d rub the side of my thumb
when were drivin’ in your car, and you sing the most outrageous song.
seeing the sincerity in your eyes when you would say “i love you”,
that phrase is way over due.
that crooked smile of yours that matches mine,
thinking about it makes me want to cry.

thinking of the mistakes i’ve made,
the thought brings me shame.
now you’re happy with her and give her that smile,
not thinking about it, you probably rub her thumb in the same style.
she receives the “i love you”’s,
and i receive the heart that is honestly scared, and bruised.

there are times when i feel weak and want to fall in your arms,
while you sit there and protect me from any harm.
for today, right now i must move forward,
because i know, that it’s you that i’m moving toward.
the best thing, the final goal,
without you i will never be whole.

so hear me out this one last time,
i know this relationship has been nothing but a climb.
but just know i’m in love with you and i always be, 
i will sit here and wait until you return to me.

1 comment:

  1. it's even more sad the second time you hear it.